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  1. #1
    Forum witchdoctor Hobgoblin's Avatar
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    Default When to squelch and move on

    When do you guys draw the line with someone and squelch and move on?

    had an incident today where i was accused of being autistic cause i was running shadow crypt more then once.

    My natural reaction is to squelch and move on...... am i being overtly sensitive in this case or not?

    and even if im right, do we have enough people to squelch and still be able to fill raids?

    thanks for reading!
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  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hobgoblin View Post
    When do you guys draw the line with someone and squelch and move on?

    had an incident today where i was accused of being autistic cause i was running shadow crypt more then once.

    My natural reaction is to squelch and move on...... am i being overtly sensitive in this case or not?

    and even if im right, do we have enough people to squelch and still be able to fill raids?

    thanks for reading!
    I've personally squelched very few people, but once I see something I dislike to see in chat, I don't stay lenient for long.
    Left my old guild because of an insufferable braggart.
    Enthusiasm enthusiast enthusiast.

  3. #3
    Community Member Cranjis-of-Orien's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hobgoblin View Post
    When do you guys draw the line with someone and squelch and move on?

    had an incident today where i was accused of being autistic cause i was running shadow crypt more then once.

    My natural reaction is to squelch and move on...... am i being overtly sensitive in this case or not?

    and even if im right, do we have enough people to squelch and still be able to fill raids?

    thanks for reading!
    Normally I prefer not to squelch someone if they are trying to intentionally start something with me. I squelch people if they seem to be stonewalling during a fight, or if they are just plain stupid and ruin my gaming experience with full knowledge of what was going on. A good example is if someone exits a dungeon during reaper mode and knew exactly what the consequences would be, and didn't leave because they absolutely had to, I will most likely send a couple tells to them before I decide whether or not to squelch them. But for your situation, I personally would have not squelched them right away, I would have tried to tell them what I was doing was completely reasonable in my own and many other people's eyes, and if those words appear to go in one ear and out the other, then I would say that is a good time to squelch.
    Founder and leader of The Wildcats guild on Orien

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    Community Member Cranjis-of-Orien's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xgya View Post
    Left my old guild because of an insufferable braggart.
    Yuck. Was it the kind that bragged about their achievements or the kind that boasted about how good they were?
    Founder and leader of The Wildcats guild on Orien

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  5. #5
    Community Member Hawkwier's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cranjis-of-Orien View Post
    Yuck. Was it the kind that bragged about their achievements or the kind that boasted about how good they were?
    It was both.

    I'm not sorry.

  6. #6
    Community Member MistaMagic's Avatar
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    What?, Everyone farms Shadow Crypt
    Ozzgood 45, 48, 24, 39, 110. Ozzbad 37, 41, 15, 36, 82. Ozzugly 45, 48, 21, 36, 119. EvilOzz 40, 48, 12, 38, 111. Ozzistheworst 38, 38, 15, 6, 58. and Alts on Khyber
    Past Lives: Heroic, Epic, Iconic, Racial., Reaper Points,
    Started Playing DDO In February 2010

  7. #7
    The Hatchery Enoach's Avatar
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    I've only had to squelch in one situation where after a person died in a trap (not waiting for the rogue - this was before artificer was an option) proceeded to stream swearing at everyone in the party.

    I wouldn't have squelched with just the above as my response would have been 'you are free to go find adventure somewhere else', depending on how they respond I might even help them leave the party.

    But in the end, you don't need to party with anyone that robs or attempts to rob you of the 'Fun' you are after.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cranjis-of-Orien View Post
    Yuck. Was it the kind that bragged about their achievements or the kind that boasted about how good they were?
    ...Both.

    I had been in that guild for 5 years, yet it took this one person being officer in there for me to snap.
    Enthusiasm enthusiast enthusiast.

  9. #9
    Community Member Hawkwier's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Xgya View Post
    ...Both.

    I had been in that guild for 5 years, yet it took this one person being officer in there for me to snap.
    Fair's fair though mate. I mean, I AM awesome!

  10. #10
    Community Member TitusOvid's Avatar
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    Entirely up to you.
    I don't squelch normally. I put people on the friends list to stalk them. If I squelch I can't report a certain someone known on the server for inappropriate behaviour.
    I got a book in my mind though. The "Buch der Trottel". Quite a long list.

    Cheers,
    Titus.
    Beste, Titus. | playing since 2009 | Don't do the fun wrong | New to Orien? Join the ingame Titan Channel | Soko Irrlicht freut sich immer über neue Mitglieder | Deutscher Discord | Orien Raiding Discord Toons: Titus Ovid , Bruder, Upload, Zzed, (Rubbel)

  11. #11
    Community Member Cranjis-of-Orien's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Enoach View Post
    I've only had to squelch in one situation where after a person died in a trap (not waiting for the rogue - this was before artificer was an option) proceeded to stream swearing at everyone in the party.

    I wouldn't have squelched with just the above as my response would have been 'you are free to go find adventure somewhere else', depending on how they respond I might even help them leave the party.

    But in the end, you don't need to party with anyone that robs or attempts to rob you of the 'Fun' you are after.
    This reminds me of the time in HC when I was a healer, and an overconfident, undergeared rogue charged ahead into spike traps and died instantly. He yelled at me for not being able to heal him in time.
    Founder and leader of The Wildcats guild on Orien

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  12. #12
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    If someone is repeatedly harassing or stalking me, then of course they get squelched. That's been very rare over the years.

    If I happen to be running a quest with someone that I have a bad experience with, they don't get squelched just for being rude, or just for being incompetent. If I did, my squelch list would probably be full!

    If they're both incompetent and rude, though, then they get to qualify.
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    Our final update of 2014 will extend the level cap to 30, which is intended to be DDO’s “permanent” level cap

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by MistaMagic View Post
    Everyone farms Shadow Crypt
    You're as bad as the person the OP mentioned. Guess what? Not everyone plays exactly the same way you do. Unlike OP's insult-hurler, some people like to run it more than once. And unlike you, who don't want to just insult others, but turn them into un-persons, plenty of other people run it only once, or even not at all.
    Quote Originally Posted by ProducerRowan View Post
    Our final update of 2014 will extend the level cap to 30, which is intended to be DDO’s “permanent” level cap

  14. #14
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    I would of laughed at it. Actually I would of wanted to see if all they had was a infantile attempt at smack talk. I can admire someone with a skill to talk trash.
    My squelch list is 0. It's easy to ignore the fodder when you don't read or listen to any in game comms.
    Last edited by Dnarth; 01-17-2021 at 10:25 PM.

  15. #15
    Community Member dennisck2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hobgoblin View Post
    When do you guys draw the line with someone and squelch and move on?

    had an incident today where i was accused of being autistic cause i was running shadow crypt more then once.

    My natural reaction is to squelch and move on...... am i being overtly sensitive in this case or not?

    and even if im right, do we have enough people to squelch and still be able to fill raids?

    thanks for reading!
    I guess I'm a jerk. If he insulted you calling you autistic, squelch him. If a person's first go-to is insulting you, then he isn't the type of player we need here, regardless of game population. We don't need that kind of toxicity here.
    Proud guild gimp of Synergia! Adults only. Bring beer. Pants optional.
    Banginurz/Chimpinurz/Shagginurz/Spankinurz.

  16. #16
    Community Member Varr's Avatar
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    Haven't been very many times I've been verbally attacked, those few and many others that I found generically annoying have been squelched.

    Stopped doing so a few years ago......as it is bothersome to unsquelch some to add others. You can only squelch list like 40 guys.

    I post all my runs, and has been interesting over the years to be on like 4 of a quest chain and have one party member pm me that so and so has been talking to me in party chat and wondering why I've not responded. It is quite simple, the 000's and 111's that you call party mates either are at least a net neutral to your gaming experience or should be removed.

    The bozo's can still party with you and join your groups and visa versa, their communications are just cut off from pestering you. Why on earth wouldn't you squelch someone that has insulted you in a nasty not fun fashion?

    Admittedly, I'm pretty universally loved on Cannith, so might be able to be more liberal with my indignations.........but still, keep the good and cull the bad.
    Last edited by Varr; 01-18-2021 at 12:22 AM.
    Varr's all over. Cannith Varr getting the love currently.

  17. #17
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    It's really just about your sanity. Squelching doesn't hurt them or anyone else, but if it eases your mind and makes playing a game more fun - do it.
    I think I only squelched 2 people once. It was "Invaders!", they were going the wrong way (leaving the part to the left of the entrance which would mean twice as much back tracking and triple back tracking on top). I have no problem with unexperienced or bad players, it's good to help people out, but they were absolutely adamant that they were going the right way, they were the strong players and I was a moron and weak for actually doing a third of the quest solo. It went so far that they refused to ress me (only managed to clear it with the help of Jibber's) and tried pressuring me into leaving the quest. That's where I drew the line. Squelch and wait, 2 entries for my personal black list.^^
    Btw, I totally forgot those two goons, but the way you described your situation - you wanting to do it the objectively better way (for you: more XPM, for me: faster), someone else doing it worse and not accepting their fault, eventually resorting to toxic behaviour reminded me of it. But in a fun "lol, some people" not a sad "I've seen things, man... you weren't there!" way.

    At the end of the day, apart from a few instances, this game of ours requires very little verbal communication which makes squelching a much more reasonable choice that we often forget.

  18. #18
    Community Member Iyllelia's Avatar
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    I see it as very simple: Ask yourself if you ever would like to play with the person again.

    If we're here to have fun then someone ruining your fun is probably a good candidate. You don't need to justify it to anyone.

  19. #19
    Community Member False_Gods's Avatar
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    Ive never had to squelch anyone and to be honest I think that if you have to squelch someone you are part of the problem. I just keep in mind that everyone has a different perspective on things and just because someone may put something in chat that doesnt sit well with me, it doesn't necessarily mean I need to put them on my ignore list. I'd be interested in hearing more details to this argument that ended up with the ignored person calling the OP 'autistic'. I mean yeah I guess if you are dealing with a 13 year old or something it seems feasible, but to be honest in my 15 years of playing I have never encountered a single what you would call 'immature' individual. I guess it probably helps that I am a very accommodating person in terms of giving people space. I realize that people say things, they have bad days, it doesn't mean they are a bad person. Often times giving people a break can go a long way to 'correcting' what might otherwise seem to be strange or immature behavior.

    Again if only for a lack of any other interesting discussion I'd be interested in knowing how it escalated to include calling someone autistic. As someone who can easily raise an eyebrow at farming shadow crypt over and over simply because I play the game to enjoy myself, not to accumulate past lives in the shortest amount of time possible, I can also see how being on a life that one may not particularly enjoy they could be inclined to run shadow crypt ad nauseum to skip a level or two (or three, lol)
    Tales of terror abound in coastal cities of a powerful cabal of sea-faring pirates led by a trio of mages who have coined themselves 'The False Gods'.

  20. #20
    Community Member False_Gods's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iyllelia View Post
    I see it as very simple: Ask yourself if you ever would like to play with the person again.

    If we're here to have fun then someone ruining your fun is probably a good candidate. You don't need to justify it to anyone.
    Seems a bit harsh. Maybe instead of looking for people to point out as 'ruining your fun' and then getting to add them to your squelch list you might try just giving people a break and looking away once in a while.

    What I see here are people who are hungry to add people to their squelch list and then when the people who they squelched or otherwise tried to avoid want to go play on the hard core server they start having a hissy fit about no more Hard core server because their selection pool of people they would like to squelch and people who they have approved has started to run dry.

    Try giving people a break and looking the other way once in a while. It goes a long way to keep up healthy game populations. Just an idea.
    Tales of terror abound in coastal cities of a powerful cabal of sea-faring pirates led by a trio of mages who have coined themselves 'The False Gods'.

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