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  1. #1
    Community Member schelsullivan's Avatar
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    Default Are MMO and addiction?

    Do you think DDO and other MMO's can become and addiction? I played ye ole Evercrack more that 10 hours a day back in my youth up until I got married and started producing offspring. I was definitely addicted. I was hard to quit, but changing all those diapers and chasing toddlers helped.

    Now that my kids are practically teens I realize ive been playing DDO for about 6 years though only 3 of 4 hours a go but most every day. It seems like It could be a habit now too but not nearly as bad as EQ was. I try not to let it interfere with real life but often I dont want to go out and do other things like, dinner parties and other social events.

    Im in my mid 40s so im having classic mid life crisis as well, "am I wasting my life" "existential angst" and all that jazz. Do any of you guys feel that way?
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  2. #2
    Founder & Hero cdbd3rd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by schelsullivan View Post
    Do you think DDO and other MMO's can become and addiction? ...
    Pretty anything can become an "addiction". Depending on what that 'thing' is can change the label applied to it.


    Chewing fingernails. Some people have a hard time breaking the "habit", tho it can qualify as an addiction.

    Smoking. Certainly qualifies as an addiction, tho people prefer to refer to it as just a "habit".

    Forum trolling. Just a habit. Just a habit. No addiction here.


    Gaming. (Console/MMO/FPS/RTS) ... Absolutely. DDO saved me from a decade+ long Diablo *ahem* "habit".



    Quote Originally Posted by schelsullivan View Post
    ...

    Im in my mid 40s so im having classic mid life crisis as well, "am I wasting my life" "existential angst" and all that jazz. Do any of you guys feel that way?

    Force yourself now to start your recovery. Before "Am I wasting my life?" becomes "I wasted my life!"
    Last edited by cdbd3rd; 06-25-2014 at 01:09 PM.
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  3. #3
    Scholar Of Adventure & Hero Missing_Minds's Avatar
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    We can become addicted to just about anything. Games, not just DDO or other MMOs, included.

    If you are asking the question of "am I wasting my life," then somewhere in your subconscious you feel that you are and you have recognized such.

    It may be time to make a list of other things you have an interest in. Travel, reading, learning, crafting, and talk it over with the people that are a big part of your life. If you find things you want to do together, it may make such that much more meaningful for you.

  4. #4
    Community Member Qhualor's Avatar
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    I broke my computer screen a couple weeks ago. For 5 days all I did was refresh the forums on my phone once every minute. I'm not addicted at all.
    Last edited by Qhualor; 06-25-2014 at 03:45 PM.

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by schelsullivan View Post
    Im in my mid 40s so im having classic mid life crisis as well, "am I wasting my life" "existential angst" and all that jazz. Do any of you guys feel that way?
    Oh my. Is age getting to you? Are the first twinges of those advancing years arriving uninvited? Do you awaken in the middle of the night panicked by thoughts of your own mortality?

    Meh. We all gonna die.

    Embrace the experience. Attempt to understand wisdom imparted by years without ossifying belief. Let go of youth without forgetting the emprise. Think young and live old. When the end comes welcome it as a friend long remembered but rarely encountered.

    As for addiction - It's what we do when escaping, avoiding or ignoring an unpleasant something.
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  6. #6
    2015 DDO Players Council Seikojin's Avatar
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    Yes, like others have said, anything and everything can be an addiction. Life is an addiction too.

    As far as the midlife crisis... I find that people who have unrequited aspects of their life tend to find themselves in a crisis. Be content in the fact that you get to do what you want and are alive. We all wish for more financial freedom to not have to work for it, but being at that point where you work hard for your money, and use it to live in a happy way; that is the new dream most people don't get.

    Not trying to be mean or anything. It is just a perspective that is easily lost when you get bogged down by what if's.
    Last edited by Seikojin; 06-25-2014 at 03:09 PM.

  7. #7
    Community Member schelsullivan's Avatar
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    Thanks for the responses, all good stuff there.
    Argonnessen - Glibb Bonefish, Lev 28 pure Elf Ranger

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    The Hatchery CThruTheEgo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by schelsullivan View Post
    Im in my mid 40s so im having classic mid life crisis as well, "am I wasting my life" "existential angst" and all that jazz. Do any of you guys feel that way?
    It's not so much what you do that matters. What really matters is, when it's over, how will you answer the question, "Was it worth it?" This is what defines a meaningful life and you need not wait until the end of life to ask it. You can ask yourself this question every moment and let the answer determine whether you continue on the current path or find a new one.
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  9. #9
    Community Member schelsullivan's Avatar
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    You know our culture sometimes looks down on video games and gamers. As if they were a waste of time. Dang it, I think their are just plain fun and can be good for you. I think playing games keeps my brain healthy and young. Dont feel guilty for gaming!
    Argonnessen - Glibb Bonefish, Lev 28 pure Elf Ranger

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by schelsullivan View Post
    I think playing games keeps my brain healthy and young.
    Straight from the AARP - If you can't trust them you probably don't vote.
    The newest computer can merely compound, at speed, the oldest problem in the relations between human beings, and in the end the communicator will be confronted with the old problem, of what to say and how to say it. - Edward R. Murrow (1964)

  11. #11
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    Interesting thread. Something I have thought about from time to time.

    I work in the addiction recovery field, and have worked with Alcoholics, drug addicts, gambling addicts, and sex addicts. There are certain qualities and behavioral patterns that addicts/alcoholics have. I myself am a recovering addict (13 years clean and sober) I can honestly say that I see many of these same qualities an behaviors in some gamers. If I went into detail, there wouldn't be enough space in one or two posts to define/describe what these qualities and behaviors are. What I can say is that if there is a part of you that has wondered if you are wasting your life, then maybe it's time to take a break and really consider this question.

    I think playing video games can be beneficial, depending on how one plays them. Essentially, video gaming is a leisure activity. All people engage in leisure activities. Some people watch TV, some read, some surf the net, some play video games. However, if this activity interferes with your life or gets in the way of engaging in social/enjoyable activities, or with other obligations, that's when it is considered a problem.

    In the chemical health field, there are many things we look at to determine if someone is an addict and what level of care they may need to get sober some of the things we look at are what chemical/behavior a person is engaging in, how often they engage, and how much of an impact it has had on their life. To simplify, if someone puts their chemical use/behavior before things like paying bills, buying groceries, spending time with loved ones, engaging in social activities, personal hygiene; and on top of that has suffered negative consequences from their use such as: Loss of employment, loss of control over finances, damaged relationships, legal consequences etc, and despite these continue to engage in the damaging behavior, we know they are a candidate for treatment.

    Can too much video gaming result in legal consequences? No, but can result in other of the above mentioned problems.

    Video gaming, and internet use is being looked at more and more by the professionals in the field. One thing we are certain of is that what happens in the brain while playing video games is very similar to what happens in the brain of an addict when they get their fix. It works on the reward centers of the brain.

    My advice to you. Step away from the computer for a while. Not just gaming, but everything involved with computer use. Do you find that your thoughts tend to wonder towards gaming/computer use? Do you feel irritable or agitated? Do you dream about gaming or using a computer. Do you wonder whats going on in the DDO community? On top of this ask yourself if your relationships have suffered as a result of your gaming, Have you had difficulty paying bills because you have spent money on the game? Have you forgotten important obligations like cleaning the house, paying bills, eating or buying groceries? Has your physical health deteriorated as a result of spending less time being physical?

    These are important things for all gamers to consider.

  12. #12
    Scholar Of Adventure & Hero Missing_Minds's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by schelsullivan View Post
    Dont feel guilty for gaming!
    And you should not. However, once gaming takes a higher priority than other aspects in your life that is when it becomes detrimental.

    Personal story time. Before my wife an I got married, we were living together. Me pulling a 40 hour a week job and her with college. And both of us putting in 40 hours+ into DDO. How much time do you think we really spent 'together'? Not much, thankfully I recognized that so encouraged us to go and eat out. (You try pulling an addict away from something. ) Much more than we should have, but that forced change of environment also kept us talking and communicating. Without that I'm pretty certain we would have broken up.

    I'm not saying you are making bad decisions, only you know your situation. I'm just pointing out what I dealt with.

  13. #13
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    I think this game can be addicting. I personally believe most people who play this game every single day for multiple hours use the game to fill some void in their own lives. Personally, I've been there. I used to play DDO ~40 hours a week. I used the game to distract myself from my own personal problems. It also gave me that sense of achievement I was missing in my real life. Any time you feel like you "have" to play instead of you "want" to play there is a problem. If the thought of not playing DDO for a day or two really bothers you, take a step back and reevaluate your priorities because it's likely you have a problem.

    Nowadays, I'm back to a healthy place with DDO. I play maybe 3 days a week, and I never feel like I must play. I still have a blast playing but I never get upset if I can't play for a few days and have gone whole months without playing with no second thoughts about it.

  14. #14
    Community Member Chai's Avatar
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    While I think anything can be addicting, the term needs to be taken with the context. Here in America the average person is watching ~35 hours of TV a week. Most gamers I know watch far less TV and some of that time goes into playing whatever game(s) they are interested in. I find the negative connotation of playing MMOs ironic in a society where watching TV along the same hours as a full time job is thought of as being perfectly normal.
    Advocating repeated nerfs in the name of "balancing the game" then complaining about how DDO is moving away from D&D, is a direct contradiction in logic - D&D 3.5 (what DDO is based on) is not a balanced game. We can either have a balanced clone MMO with homogenized classes, or we can have a D&D game. We cant have both.

  15. #15
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    Anything can be an addicition. Literally anything, for emotional addiction (rather than physical) the detail kind of doesn't matter, whether it's gaming, reading, hoarding, cats, it's all just the focus detail of a malfunctioning mechanic in the brain. One of the biggest warning signs if you have an addiction condition vs. the American slang of addiction meaning 'that person likes something and spends a lot of time enjoying him/herself' is to take a good long look at the rest of your life, and if they are failing en masse, you have a real problem vs. a hobby.

    Things to look at: The state of your finances, your house, you yard if applicable, relationships to your extended family, nuclear family, and friends. If things are running smoothly and you are participating in these things, you have a hobby, not an addiction. Not that it can't become one later mind you, but it's not one now. If a majority of these are in disarray with no logical reason why (Ex: Finances because you are out work, house: you don't have the cash from being out of work to fix things, same for yard, and the social relationships are under strain from the strain of the finances) you have a problem and would want to consider counseling to learn how to get back to the healthy balance between having fun and maintaining the rest of ones life.
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  16. #16
    Community Member Talon_Moonshadow's Avatar
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    I am addicted to having fun... usually in a way that escapes from reality.

    DDO is at the top of my list.

    But it can be non-mmo video games, or TV/movies (best if a series). It can be books.

    Can also be sleep, and a few other things.


    I am addicted to having fun (and maybe to escaping reality), not MMOs.


    But DDO really fills that addiction.
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    ..., but I honestly think the solution is to group with less whiny people.

  17. #17
    Community Member Thrudh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by schelsullivan View Post
    only 3 of 4 hours a go but most every day.
    It's probably interfering with your real life.

    Im in my mid 40s so im having classic mid life crisis as well, "am I wasting my life" "existential angst" and all that jazz. Do any of you guys feel that way?
    DDO has interfered at times in my real life too... I've told the kid and/or wife "Hold on, ten more minutes... I can't leave these complete strangers now... They need me to finish!"

    What I try to do is only play after the kid and wife are in bed, so maybe an hour a night... sometimes I play for an hour in the evening if the kid is playing next door, and the wife is watching something horrible on TV like the Bachelor.

    I also usually get in an couple of hours on the weekends too (chores in the morning, lunch, and then a quest or two!).

    Moderation in all things... Try to change it up with different games now and then... That helps you from becoming burned out/addicted... Not different MMOs... but different games, especially single-player ones that you can pause at any time if the wife needs you, and a game you can actually finish.
    Last edited by Thrudh; 07-11-2014 at 12:29 PM.
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