When one joins a group for quest, one implicitly agrees to look out for the team. Therein lies obligation.
Je ne suis pas
DDO Alpha Tester
I will put that sort of lfm up on my cleric if say I'm on my clonk and I predominantly want to fight and not heal - she has a tiny spell pool and normally I would just be soloing or running with self sufficient people. It doesn't mean I won't heal during hard battles, it just means *don't rely on me or you will die as I don't have enough for us both and I'm going to keep myself alive first*.
How do you get it that not fighting and not casting is NOT the equivalent? If I was on my clonk (and possibly just soloing everything but I wanted company so I tossed up an lfm) and got a wizard or a caster like that I would politely ask them to leave the party.
Not healing is NOT the equivalent of not doing anything.
joined a group running Eyes of Stone chain 2 days ago. party leader popped a cleric hire with a cleric in the group. the cleric was like "LOL! REALLY!?!?" the cleric dropped after completing Diplomatic Impunity. I was glad to have him in the party, but he didn't do much using maybe 1/4 of his sp and never shrined.
But it is the same as an Arcane not buffing.
So, lets put a more reasonable situation here, If you asked the Arcane for haste, Rage, FF, Blur, G Hero, or pretty much any buff, and they just scoffed at you and ran off and started to do the dungeon saying "I'm not a buff bot, noob! learn to play!" would you be all like "Oh yah, you are so right, I am so wrong to expect you to give me anything, I should totally provide all my own stuff" or would you think the person was being a jerk?
As I said I have six divine healer types, only one is a unabashed nannybot. All the other do other stuff. If I'm playing my healbot, then I'll let the other know I'm healing.
All I'm asking for is a heal if I'm incapped. Why is that not sinking in?
I usually post *There may be no healer, ip* since I take the first 5, who apply and take off. Those people, who have to rely on other sources for healing than themselves avoid these LFMs, the majority of people joining are self healing. In case nobody but one person joins I don't even care if that person pops a hireling.
Characters on Orien:
Wanzer/ Klingtanz/ Incanta Superior/ Mercantus
And I did try to heal while I was doing my divine lives... I really did.
But I solo for the most part, and the toon was set up for soloing. Major damage bonuses, and not so much in the healing power. And I gotta say, the few times I did heal a group with my FvS, (cleric was much easier to lazy heal with aura and bursts) I really noticed that I was using mana far faster keeping those two barbs up than it would be used if I just killed the monsters myself. But those guys were always out front, and it was difficult for me to get ahead and kill so they wouldn't get so banged up. But in the big battles, I pretty much just stood there and tossed heals constantly. Not what I'd call fun.
That's why I left the divines for last on my completionist. I was not looking forward to playing them. On the plus side, I actually had a lot of fun with them when I wasn't being someone's red bar nanny. Both cleric and FvS are amazingly versatile classes. They don't have to be nannybots, they can do some major dps on their own. And boy, are they hard to kill.
So while I feel for the fighters and especially barbs with their odd self hurting program, I also understand why a cleric would post a byoh lfm. And part of the problem is that so many people use hireling healers, they get into the bad habit of expecting the divine to follow them around and heal them. It's unfair to expect everyone to play a divine like a robot. Some people do, and do it well, and enjoy it. But not everyone does.
It's out of kindness I and others will notice that someone doesn't have a high enough level ship and give the resists they need, or can see they need a GH in whatever situation, or a deathward, fom or blur. And we are always willing to give out when asked (when reasonable - GH in the shroud by a level 25 barbarian?) as we can't always see what is needed (fom for example).
So I don't find your argument valid at all.
Second, buffs are not necessary to play this game. They are a nice perk but by no means required. And since we are talking about people being more self-sufficient, they are really not required.
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