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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vint View Post
    One thing that really grinds my gears is when I go to the store and here a cashier say "Happy Holidays". Why is it that they no longer say "Merry Christmas"?

    People get offended over the dumbest things. I fully understand that Turbine must take a politically correct stance on this as well, but these people that get offended over everything need to get help as they are the ones that are insecure.

    I have a very good life, with many good things and I feel very good about myself. When I say something, I say what is right, not what is socially acceptable.
    I don't think this is about being politically correct. It's about how the people on the forums, and maybe to a lesser extent, in game act with such negativity towards others. Go in to any if the current "p2w/p2c" threads and look, without thinking about the content, how much negativity and mean remarks there are. It was similar with the BYOH threads, though to be honest, the BYOH threads helped me develop a bit of a thicker skin.

    Being politically correct, imo, is saying stuff in such a way that no group of people can get upset at it. So "Merry Christmas" becomes "Happy holidays" in order to please muslims, jews, and other religions in addition to Christians. Personally, I don't really care, either way the person was trying to be nice to me, and if it more natural for them to wish me a happy holiday season with "Merry Christmas" I would actually prefer them to say that, despite not being a christian. The reason is because the message, in it's essence, is the same, but by allowing someone to do it in the most natural way possible, I feel you increase the sincerity of the message.

    Yes, I understand you may have a good life. But please, people, try to understand others may not. They may have been verbally, mentally, or even physically abused in the past. And given my situation, which at most could be a very light level of abuse (when compared to others), I can tell you these things leave scars that last for a long, long time. I'm not asking for anyone's pity, I just am very much against bullying, as I don't ever want someone to have to suffer through what I did, or more, especially over a video game

  2. #22
    Community Member Derailment's Avatar
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    Trolling impact is overrated.

  3. #23
    Community Member shores11's Avatar
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    This is a great post and I agree with your (OP) comments. The problem is that some people feel it is ok to be insulting by the fact that they are typing or talking through a PC and know that there is almost no chance (in real life) that the person they are being rude to or insulted will ever confront them. This is also to a lesser degree with drivers and road rage.

    People in general should always treat each other no matter the method of contact (i.e. virtually, car, face to face, etc...) with respect without any preconceived expectations unless latter broken. I have been a manager of employees and in many customer service environments dealing with customers and my motto is always to be nice and kind to each person as you would like them to be with you.

    I hope we all enjoy the game of D&D and the MMO version of it in DDO. As such lets all appreciate the fact that we have a lot of like minded people in the world that helps us to enjoy the game of D&D, I do.
    Last edited by shores11; 12-17-2012 at 10:34 AM.
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  4. #24
    Community Member Stoner81's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AidanRyuko View Post
    I'll try to keep this compact and objective. First of all, behavior of a bullied person lies in their own hands and agression is still their own doing and not that of a troll/bully. Also, usually the best course of handling a troll is ignoring them and/or showing a clear edge of how far they can go.

    That being said I do hope people will be reading this to understand potential impact. Though the majority of people can deal with insults and other trolling I think most people don't like having to deal with it. Besides that majority there are also people who have a hard time processing these kind of things for several reasons. If you troll those players there is a chance you potentially help them towards a depression, self hurting or worse.

    I'm not going to ask people to stop being themselves, that's an unreal expectation, but at please try to keep this in the back of your head and if you notice that someone really can't deal with your trolling just leave em alone..


    That's the end of the official message I wanted to give.

    From personal experience

    I'm from the Netherlands and a while back there was a newspaper message of a 14y old that ended his life after his "friends" hacked his game account, there was already more going on with him for that to trigger, but I get pretty sad when I read things like that, a young kid like that. It wasn't the first time I read about such things either. When I am in-game or even on the forum the huge amount of negativity can really pester my mood, you are just pressuring eachother into becoming perfect (or appearing so) rather then enjoying being yourselves. Kudo's to those that manage to stand above this, I have a few on my friendlist and proud to know them.
    Very well said sir!

    Stoner81.

  5. #25
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    Unfortunately, while I do see the intent of the op here and agree with it, for the people who seriously indulge in the bullying behavior, this confirms their reward. Many of them ENJOY knowing they have the power to drive others to misery, and even self-harm. It confirms their own twisted self-worth, and others just find the suffering of others funny.
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  6. #26

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    Quote Originally Posted by Vint View Post
    One thing that really grinds my gears is when I go to the store and here a cashier say "Happy Holidays". Why is it that they no longer say "Merry Christmas"?

    People get offended over the dumbest things. I fully understand that Turbine must take a politically correct stance on this as well, but these people that get offended over everything need to get help as they are the ones that are insecure.

    I have a very good life, with many good things and I feel very good about myself. When I say something, I say what is right, not what is socially acceptable.
    How things are said is as important as what is said.

    Saying 'I disagree with you and think your wrong because...' and 'you're a moron who doesn't have a clue because...' both have the same essence but one is discussion and the other is trolling.

  7. #27
    Community Member Pfold's Avatar
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    Default Maybe I'm just Too Old...

    ...but I just don't get this 'bullying' bit. Have we failed collectively as a society to properly rear our children? If you coddle people until they enter adulthood they'll never understand why they get fired from a job, broke up in a relationship, etc. All those people have ever heard their whole life is "Great Job" and " Yes" and develop 0 coping skills. It's a sorry state of affairs IMO.

    Then there's the actual impact of words.

    The authors of the words aren't the ones determining the power of them... ...it's the recipient. The people receiving them are the ones that determine how much of an impact they have upon themselves. People allow themselves to take things personally and get upset instead of considering the facts and replying or just walking away. It's funny how people lose their critical thinking skills when 'feelings' are brought into it.

    Like I said maybe I'm too old but I never heard of these types of bad situations coming about in my day. Maybe they were some but they were so far and few between that they were anomalies.
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  8. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pfold View Post
    ...but I just don't get this 'bullying' bit. Have we failed collectively as a society to properly rear our children? If you coddle people until they enter adulthood they'll never understand why they get fired from a job, broke up in a relationship, etc. All those people have ever heard their whole life is "Great Job" and " Yes" and develop 0 coping skills. It's a sorry state of affairs IMO.

    Then there's the actual impact of words.

    The authors of the words aren't the ones determining the power of them... ...it's the recipient. The people receiving them are the ones that determine how much of an impact they have upon themselves. People allow themselves to take things personally and get upset instead of considering the facts and replying or just walking away. It's funny how people lose their critical thinking skills when 'feelings' are brought into it.

    Like I said maybe I'm too old but I never heard of these types of bad situations coming about in my day. Maybe they were some but they were so far and few between that they were anomalies.
    I'm pretty sure it's been said a number of times in this thread, but it's about how you say it.

    Quote Originally Posted by ninjadwarf_uk
    Saying 'I disagree with you and think your wrong because...' and 'you're a moron who doesn't have a clue because...' both have the same essence but one is discussion and the other is trolling.
    that's one example of how the same idea can be expressed 2 different ways, and I think almost everyone would rather have the first over the second. Also, this thread was about how for some people, there are no "Great Job" statements, there are people who are verbally, mentally, and/or physically abused. Considering how fragile I am, and what I went through is, at the most extreme perspective, just over the borderline, I can see how for someone who had real levels of abuse the way a sentence like that is put could mean the difference between a good day and suicide.

    This is amplified by the anonymity of the internet. You don't know whether the person on the other end is a person relaxing from a hard day at work or a person trying to escape from the abusive horrors of their life.

  9. #29
    Community Member Vint's Avatar
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    edit:

    sorry, not worth starting a fight over in light of everything.
    Last edited by Vint; 12-17-2012 at 09:29 AM. Reason: typo
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  10. #30
    Community Member Knobull's Avatar
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    "Sticks and stones may break my bones
    But names will never hurt me"

    If only it were so. If only it were so. I just do not understand the need to kick people when they are down.

    Rest in peace: Amanda Todd, Ryan Halligan and Megan_Meier.

    Someday the online paradigm will change. The Anonymous outing of Amanda Todd's abuser was almost that change, but in itself, through inaccuracy and assumption showed part of the problem.

    I just do not understand taking pleasure in the misery of others and even enjoying their death. It is such an awful thing. Why?

    The feeling you get when you help someone is such a wonderful thing. I feel bad for people who never experience that.
    Never forget: Amanda Todd, Ryan Halligan, Megan_Meier, GamerGate
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    "... none but ourselves can free the mind." - Marcus Garvey, 1937

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