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View Full Version : How to be a Leet DDO player



Kalari
08-28-2008, 11:02 AM
Note this is written in pure satire, if any of these reflect you..well my condolenses lol

How to be an Leet DDO player written in the words by Captain IRBETATHANUNEVERYWAYZ.

(Note not Elite, Leet cause uber people dont need no stinking E or I in their words!)

1. Zerging is a must, oh but not just no optionals baby I mean if it dont get cut down quick i'll leave it so that those less then me finish up, see I can share the kill count and their 1 to my 60 makes us all look good! What? Oh they are new and dont have the weapons spells to do the job? Ahh well I know not to group with them again sheesh cant take down an elite orthon with half its hp?

2. All clerics are in my pocket, I mean come on my uber skills keeps their asses alive, so they better be healing me. I dont care if im threw a door or a level or two down in a dungeon Im their God!

3. Whats a new player? I gots no time to teach things if they cant keep up they can at least get the chest, provided they dont die. I mean how hard is it to navigate the Titan *rolls eyes*

4. Sure I roleplay as the mega overlord of stormreach, my 20 w/p raipers of kick your arse will pwn you in PVP!

5. My entire group of friends run my server and if we dont like how you look you wont be running with us. Shunning FTW!

6. Real life? Oh im a superstar drive fancy cars and have a hot wife that Id rather ignore to play this game

7. If im yelling at you over the mic im just trying to show you how to have mad skills (see get it im mad and trying to show you my skills)

8. I can solo raids like VOD by myself I only bring the 11 others to get a better shot at things in the chest, and god help them if they pull what I want and dont put it up for a roll. And Id better not see anyone taking their loot!

9. Potions? Unless they are them Mnemonics I dont bother I have no room with my 50+ greater bane weapons and +5 MFP's. And the Mnemonics I use as leverage for those picky casters who wont buff me, come on spell boy hop for the potion.

10. Dont tell me to wear a shield TWF GTWF FTW babe! My AC is in the hundreds I mean like Harry can only tickle me yeah! What I died..well thats the clerics/bard/ranger/insert class that can use wands that I brought along since im so great just to top me off when im scratch. I hope you have a high umd or can RAISE ME!



Those are 10 Ive thought of so far hehe just writting in jest(putting that again just in case some people take this nonsense seriously) Either way when I think of more i'll put them here and welcome anyone else with some of their own satire to join in.

Missing_Minds
08-28-2008, 02:52 PM
8. I can solo raids like VOD by myself I only bring the 11 others to get a better shot at things in the chest, and god help them if they pull what I want and dont put it up for a roll. And Id better not see anyone taking my loot!

fixed it for you.

Beherit_Baphomar
08-28-2008, 02:54 PM
6. Real life? Oh im a superstar drive fancy cars and have a hot wife that Id rather ignore to play this game

Heh, I like this one...

totmacher
08-28-2008, 03:03 PM
*cries*

that's beautiful man, beautiful

this almost describes me to a t



DIE NOOBS DIE!!!!!

Beherit_Baphomar
08-28-2008, 03:06 PM
7. If im yelling at you over the mic im just trying to show you how to have mad skills (see get it im mad and trying to show you my skills)


DIE NOOBS DIE!!!!!

Wow....would you look at that!!?

Seacog
08-28-2008, 03:11 PM
[QUOTE=Kalari;1842111]Note this is written in pure satire, if any of these reflect you..well my condolenses lol

How to be an Leet DDO player written in the words by Captain IRBETATHANUNEVERYWAYZ.

(Note not Elite, Leet cause uber people dont need no stinking E or I in their words!)

9. Potions? Unless they are them Mnemonics I dont bother I have no room with my 50+ greater bane weapons and +5 MFP's. And the Mnemonics I use as leverage for those picky casters who wont buff me, come on spell boy hop for the potion.

hahahaha! I love this one... even if my main is a caster....and i soooooooo use pneumonics for leverage and to make unhappy casters like me, or bribe for heals, or bribe for blur or rage or stoneskin or displacement or haste.. you get the point

Aeneas
08-28-2008, 03:14 PM
Leet has 2 E's.

Bow before my leet alphabet skills!

Beherit_Baphomar
08-28-2008, 03:17 PM
Leet has 2 E's.

Bow before my leet alphabet skills!

It actually has two 3's and no E's.

Pfft! And you call yourself l33t.

totmacher
08-28-2008, 03:18 PM
actually you both are wrong, since leet is shorthand for elite

which used to be 31337 till u lamers took it over


like i said

DIE NOOBS DIE!!!!!!!!!!! *zergs ahead*

Kalari
08-28-2008, 04:44 PM
LOL guys thanks for joining in the fun :)

I realize that the first one from Captain IRBETATHANUNEVERYWAY was a bit anti melee so here is one from MISTRESS MYMANAMYLAW!

1. If Im expected to heal you youd better pony up at least 20k pp just to have my presence in your group. Scrolls? Sure I keep 100 of each, but I dont use them I just have them just to show I keep a 100.

2. Haste? But if I keep you and these other peons hasted I wont have enough to finger of death the entire dungeon. Crowd control? They wont need that if they are all dead by my hand..what the giants in tor have deathward since when? And buffs? Sigh I suppose I can cast a non extended resist but nothing more GH? Go farm the Xorian Cipher pfft noob think im gonna waste all my mana giving you such buffs, and dont even fix your mouth to ask for a stoneskin, I dont care if I do have 10 wands of it!

3. Heal warforge? Last time I checked there wasnt a cleric icon under my name..whats repair? I didnt take any focus in such a pathetic line, what part of Nuker dont you understand?

4. Sure the icon says cleric but im to busy matching your kill count to heal you. Oh I'll bring your stone to the shrine once my mana is out.

5. Dont tell me how to cast I knew what I was doing when I fireballed the web I just put up! And no no your supposed to lead the mobs to my Discoball then kill them, gah do I have to tell you how to Melee again?

6. When I pull +3 strength tomes of course I eat them I need the strength to carry those 10 dream spitters in my backpack!

7. When the group looks like its about to wipe, nothing says fun like a handy teleport or dd for myself only of course.

8. Why should I command or soundburst mobs for you? You should have the proper weapons to take down mobs while I toss the ocassional overheal on your arse.

9. Why should I worry about mobs running at me when I firewall them? You meat shields are supposed to protect me! IF not no hasty for you!

10. I seriously get aggrivated when melees kill off my pretty statues, I mean I waste all that time flesh to stoning them for my future guild house garden and they kill them before I decide where to place them on the lawn!

11. Yes you can hear my family in the backround but id much rather run around as a hot elf then cook or clean! I mean come on Fantasy > Real life!


lol ive too much time on my hand, if I think of more i'll put them here ^_^

Bekki
09-02-2008, 08:09 AM
/Bekki falls of his barstool!

OMG! That is Awesome!:D

ROFLMAO!!!:D:D:D

http://home.att.net/~cdbd3rd/rofl.gif